Said the homeless gentleman on the T. He told me I could call him the “mac-daddy” but unfortunately I did not have much chance to call him by his name. I did, however, gladly observe as he slouched on a bench and absentmindedly slipped his hand into his coat pocket only to discover a bottle of not quite empty whiskey. The mac-daddy is therefore obviously my hero. I mean, not only did he make a bottle of brown whiskey appear out of his pocket as well as knock back this magical brown whiskey and smash the empty bottle, he was also blind in one eye! He told me himself six times and I believe it. He also had dreadlocks. And a cane; or was it a wand. Illusions man...
This was about a year and a fortnight ago. Since then I have grown familiar with the goings on of the T. So I was not alarmed when tonight I encountered a fellow mbta rider who said to me “I like your sweatshirt... bats. Yeah bats. I was a bat in my second life you know”. Ok I lied. I was a bit alarmed; because what life does that put him on now?! His nonchalant tone suggests that he has had quite a few them. Like, “no big deal, I’m a human now but I was a bat in my second life and a venus fly trap in my last life. I’m hoping for something more predatory next but really I’d be happy with just a rocky mountain goat.” I wish I had time to discuss this situation but I guess I’m not as prepared for the goings on of the T as i would like to think. All I managed to mutter was “Thanks yeah bats are pretty much the best”. But real talk, I hate bats. I’ve been terrified of them ever since I was swarmed by them that summer in 1998.
3 years ago
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