perhaps a pampered pigeon peacefully pecking at pileworts?

If you were homeless would you eat a pigeon?

Things to consider:
You would have to catch it first.
You would have to build a fire in a trashcan.
You would be living in a city where pigeons carry a multitude of diseases such as psittacosis.
You would have a peg leg.
You would be so so hungry and would not have coffee OR sugar.